DAVE SCROLLS
SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO.
Dave opened X for 5 minutes.
72 hours later, his eyes became candles.
He has not blinked. He has not slept.
The timeline is still open.
the 72-hour saga.
six panels. zero sleep. one cooked man.
opened X
just gonna check the timeline real quick.
"just checking"
still scrolling. clock is lying.
joined 4 telegrams
doesn't speak the language. still aping.
candles appeared
in the pupils. medically concerning.
phone welded to hand
doctor said it's fine. doctor was a bot.
forgot real life
what is sun. what is mom. what is rent.
became the ticker
$DAVE. He is the chart now.
this is his screen.
- 47 unread notifications
- 3 charts open
- 1 timeline still loading
- 0 sleep detected
No edits. No filter. Scroll if you dare.
- 02Buy on Pump.fun
- 03Join Telegram
- 04Follow X
- 05Post "one more scroll"
- 06Never close the timeline
three cursed chapters.
The Awakening
He just wanted to check one tweet. The timeline opened a portal. He hasn't returned.
The Candles
On hour 12, the green and red bars crawled into his eyes. He saw the chart. The chart saw him.
The Confession
He whispered 'one more scroll' to a houseplant. The plant agreed. The plant is now mod in the TG.
confess to dave.
what did the timeline do to you?
opened X at lunch. now it's tuesday. send help.
thought it was a notification. it was the sun.
my thumb has its own scroll wheel now.
I just need ONE more scroll, then I'm logging off forever.
saw a real candle today. flinched.
my plant joined a TG before I did.
the timeline
is still open.
Dave is still scrolling. Are you in?